Featured Blogger: Christina Voors
First date spots can go one of three ways: it can be fine, uncomfortable, or never seen. Yes, never seen can happen.
I’ve had a few of those, where I’m talking to someone on a dating app that I’m starting to feel comfortable with. Then he asks for the date, and will say something like “I know this off-the-beaten-path trail in the mountains, want to go on a night hike?”
After picturing the many ways I could die by the hand of this stranger, I either decline, or ghost away from the conversation.
Being comfortable on dates is important, but even more so when the first date is also the first meeting. It’s time to get to know one another and establish how you each feel in-person. With that, it’s important to choose a place that fosters a safe environment, where you can each connect.
Unfortunately, even with the best of intentions, choosing the wrong type of venue can kill any chance of moving forward.
There are many cardinal sins of choosing a first date spot. Let’s take a dive:
Maybe you truly do just want to watch Netflix and chill. I’ll give you that benefit of the doubt. But you need to keep in mind how this offer comes across to the other person. It can come across anywhere from lazy to dangerous. How would your date know they are safe there?
Besides that, it is just a clear booty call. Maybe both parties have agreed that is what they are looking for, but even then, it would be preferable to meet at a bar first.
In General, Private Spots
Random night hikes included. It is online dating 101 to meet in a public place, and if you are pushing something other than that, it can raise a red flag.
The “Go-To” Spot
It’s easy to choose a usual spot when you meet someone. It’s comfortable, you like the drinks or the food, and it decreases the risk of choosing a bad spot. That said, it could come across as sleazy when you have one spot you bring all your dates to. There are often a number of locations you can bring someone. Make the spot as unique as the person you are meeting.
If you are choosing to watch a game together, this is great. Otherwise, the constant cheering interrupting your conversation, and the amazing play going on right above your date’s head, only serve as unnecessary distractions.
Eccentric can be cute, or very uncomfortable for your date. I have a friend who met someone for their first date at a bar with pictures of naked women all over the walls. Points for being original, but keep in mind that they may not be interested in jumping into a venue like that without knowing you first.
This just feels like an excuse to grind, without any real shot of hearing each other over the music. Better to wait until you two are comfortable with each other. Similarly…
Though it can be a fun first date in terms of activity, many people won’t be comfortable throwing on a swimsuit for a first date. It can feel too revealing too quickly.
This just screams commitment, commitment, commitment! You may really want a date to this wedding, but it needs to wait until you two have established some sort of foundation.
A lot can go into picking just the right spot for a first date. Avoiding the above can protect you from many pitfalls. However, there is a way to bypass this decision all together.
Through the online dating app Chekmate, pre-approved dating spots will be immediately available for you and your future date. Chekmate partners with local vendors and affiliates, so you can trust that the place you will be meeting will be a good one.
Don’t ruin your shot because of a bad meeting spot. Don’t feel uncomfortable or unsafe because of the location you end up in. Feel safe, have fun. You’re not in this alone.